Free Ice Cream

Today was okay. I didn’t have much of a plan going into it, and you know what they say: if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. The server went down at work so we went to take a break in the caf, and lo and behold there were free ice cream sundaes, and how could I refuse that? I had a scoop each of vanilla and chocolate, some fudge and a few M&Ms. I’d already skipped my morning snack and eliminated my carb from dinner, so the calories were still under 1,500. And my macronutrients were in check. And I just had a handful of chocolate chips right in the middle of that sentence, but I’m pretty sure I’m still just below 1,500 calories.

Tomorrow will be a crazy cardio session since it’s Saturday and I can afford the time during the day, then Sunday is weigh-in.

Thirsty Thursday

I’m hungry for it — the strength, the muscles, the body, the transformation.  I want it.  I am transforming each week, each day, each minute.

This week, I’ve been focusing on my core in my strength training.  Did some tonight and my abs are absolutely killing me, but I know that it’s worth it.  Next week will be my legs — I see lunges in my future.  I definitely had two cheat meals this week but I don’t think that’s bad at all.  Weigh-in on Sunday and I’m nervous!

Here’s a link to an article and video with a similar exercise to something I’m doing this week for my abs.  I use a 5-pound dumbbell:

weighted gym-ball crunch

Back from Outer Space

I really am being serious, I promise!  As it turns out, getting back on track with my cardio and strength training is not easy to balance with extra hours at work and a social life.  When I weighed in 1-1/2 weeks ago, I came in at exactly 200 pounds.  The math is easy, since I want to get to 150. Once I get there, I’ll re-assess and see if I need to lose any more.  This past March, I found out that my cholesterol is at 215, so I want to get that down, too.

And I’m happy to report that I did make progress this week!  I was down five pounds to 195 on Sunday morning.  Phew — back in one-derland!  I really do believe that the strength training helped there.  Last week, I did four half-hour sessions of strength training, focusing on my arms.  I take a cross-functional approach, meaning that, while I do have a focus, I am typically working other parts of my body at the same time.  So, I might do dumbbell flies on a Swiss ball.  So I’m activating my core for balance and my glutes for stability, though the primary focus is on my chest and I’m sure I’m working my biceps.  This week, the focus is on my core so that should be fun.

Yesterday, I took a break from the cardio but I’ll be hitting it hard again tonight.  I’m super into the elliptical right now.  This machine does what it needs to do without so much impact.  I want to vary my cardio more but am having trouble with ideas for that.  Sometimes I’ll do the upright stationary bike too, but…I really wish I could run.  I can only run for about a minute and then I’m completely winded even if it’s just at 4mph on the treadmill.  Even when I was healthier, it was difficult.

Here’s my ipod playlist from Sunday’s session:

Baby Bash – Cyclone

Moby – Extreme Ways

Madonna & JT – Four Minutes

Fergie – Glamorous

Daniel Beddingfield – Gotta Get Thru This

Black Eyed Peas – Hey Mama

Gwen Stefani – Now That You Got It

Mariah & T-Pain – Migrate

PCD & Timbaland – Wait a Minute

Timbaland & Keri Hilson – The Way I Are

NIN – Head Like a Hole

INXS – Pretty Vegas

Britney & Madonna – Me Against the Music

Being that I’m 5′ 7″, My current BMI is 30.5.  Mini-goal #1?  Get out of the “obese” category — get to 191 so that I’m in the “overweight” range.  That’s only four pounds away, so hopefully I can get there by Sun., 10/19.  Weigh-ins are on Sundays for now, so this week I made it my “cheat day,” since it’s the furthest point from the next time I’ll weigh in.  It worked out well this week this week since I was with my mother celebrating her birthday.  It went alright though…I had a cupcake from the package I brough her from the grocery store, and some Chinese food at the mall food court.  But I also didn’t have lunch.  Sure, I went over on my calories and I didn’t eat at all of my normally scheduled times, but that’s what cheat day is for!  This day will likely vary sometimes depending on my plans for the week.

A couple of my friends told me this week that I already look more toned.  Hopefully, I can get some pics up soon.  I would really like to take a picture of myself at least weekly so I can look back and see the progress…we’ll see how that goes.

Sunday Best

Woo!  Today I did a full strength training routine for the first time since…I don’t know when!

Strength training for today:

Dumbell Squat on balance disc @ 3 sets x 15 reps x 10 lbs.

Dumbell Lateral Row on Swiss ball @ 3 sets x 15 reps x 16 lbs.

Dumbell Fly on Swiss ball @ 3 sets x 15 reps x 20 lbs.

Sweet!  Then I went to the gym for 40 min. on the elliptical and torched 467 calories. A little less than yesterday in terms of calories burned, but I didn’t do strength training yesterday, either.

Food for today

Breakfast: 1 English muffin with 1 Tbsp. Peanut Butter and a container of Dole pears = 300 calories

Lunch: Protein shake — 1 scoop vanilla soy protein powder in 8 oz. organic fat free milk with 1/2 tsp. orange extract = 246 calories

Dinner: Some Mexican dinner concoction that my roommate’s making — ingredients are shredded chicken breast (boiled), cream of chicken soup, tomato sauce, tomatoes, taco seasoning, shredded cheddar cheese and flour tortillas = approx. 634 calories

Total calories for the day: 1,185 calories

I’m a little under on calories for the day so maybe I’ll have some fruit or…ice cream…later.  All in moderation though!

Back from the gym.

Ran 3.21 miles on the elliptical machine for a total of 500 calories burned and a time of 40 min. 4 sec. (had to break 500 cals!)  Needed to go more slowly than usual about half way through because my heart rate monitor was telling me bad things.  I did cough a bit but I don’t think I pushed myself too, too hard.  Afterwards, while stretching, I noted a fair deal less flexibility than usual.  Haven’t been to the gym in over a month on account of being sick and then sporadically before that even.  So likely, it’s just that.  I might go to a friend’s house to help her unpack in a little while so I’m prepping lunch and dinner to bring over for myself (she’s vegan and I don’t want vegan food today, so it doesn’t feel 100% rude to be doing this).  It’s raining out today, which is totally depressing, so I’m just happy I was able to get my butt out the door!

I’m awake.

About a year ago, I lost 60 pounds.  I still wasn’t down to my goal weight of 150, but I was down from 235 to 175, and that was certainly something.  I put in a decent amount of effort — planned my meals on sparkpeople.com, got a personal trainer for a few months, went to the gym a few times per week, the whole deal.  I was going through a breakup and it was a project to get my mind off of things: Project Me.  My friends and coworkers were fantastic, cheering me on…I couldn’t go two days without someone telling me, “You look so great, you’re doing a really good job!”

But then, as the new year set in, I can’t tell you what happened.  Did I lose motivation?  That happens.  Was it because work got busier?  It’s easier to work through meals and then “make up for it” later.  Was it the singles scene?  So many parties.  Did the relationship I found myself in earlier this year play any part?  When you go out to eat all the time…

Certainly, there are lots of excuses.  And I’m sure that all of the above factors played one role or another. But I’ve recently come to realize something very simple that shocks even myself: this downward spiral, it was an act of self-sabotage.  And this self-sabotage isn’t unique to this situation; I’ve found myself doing this throughout the course of my entire life.  More on that another time.

The fact of the matter is, I stopped going to the gym and started eating crap again — I could see the weight creeping up again and did nothing to stop it.  People stopped telling me how great I looked; one woman at work asked me if I was “still on [my] diet.”  Though, as a side note, I’m viewing this endeavor as (insert snooty tone here) a lifestyle change. A change that I want to live with for the rest of my life.  I can’t do low-carb, Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, pills, all-liquid, cookies, Hoodia — whatever, I’ve tried a number of them and they just make me cranky!  And if that’s what you’re doing, I’m not here to change your mind.  But I just can’t.

My first weigh-in will be tomorrow.  I know my body and I’m guessing I’ve cracked 200 again.  Which totally sucks but, starting today I’m being really, really, really, really, really REAL with myself.  And, after I’ve weighed myself, I’ll assess where I want to go and how long I should take to get there.

Let’s talk about today’s plans.

Planned Activity

30 min. elliptical trainer with an extra 5 min. warmup and 5 min. cooldown

Planned Food

Breakfast: Protein Shake — 1 scoop chocolate soy protein powder with 1 c. organic fat free milk = 225 calories

Lunch: 4 oz. Atlantic salmon (baked) with 1 Tbsp. lemon juice and 1 tsp. ground black pepper, 1 c. frozen organic spinach (steamed) with 5 sprays “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter” spray, 1/4 c. (when dry) white Basmati rice, 1 multivitamin = 384 calories

Dinner: 4 oz. chicken breast (baked) with garlic & rosemary powder and 1 Tbsp. barbecue sauce, 1/4 c. (when dry) white Basmati rice, 1/2 c. frozen peas (steamed) = 310 calories

Snacks: 4 oz. Dannon strawberry la creme yogurt and 1/8 c. organic almonds (after the gym) = 235 calories, 1 apple with 1 Tbsp. peanut butter and 16 oz. Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi (after lunch but before dinner) = 175 calories, 1 container Dole diced pears (after dinner) = 80 calories

Total planned calories for the day = 1,403 calories

I’m trying to get away from the caffeine, but it’s a vice for now.  For the record, I’m trying not break 1,500 calories/day.  And, since my cholesterol is at 215, I’m trying to take that down and consequently, I’m watching my saturated fat intake — saturated fat should be less than 10% of my daily calories.  Today, am planning on 1,403 calories consumed.  According to sparkpeople.com, I will have consumed 37 grams of fat (which is well within my allowance of 32-56 grams of fat per day).  6.6 grams of this fat are saturated fat.  Since there are 9 calories in a gram of fat, that means I plan to consume (6.6 x 9) 59.4 calories of saturated fat.  And 59.4/1,403 = 4% saturated fat calories…well below my allotted 10% for the day.  Nicely done, but it doesn’t always work out that way!

I don’t want to start out too hard on myself because I’m just getting over four or five weeks of being sick and I’d hate to relapse or cause it to go on longer than it needs to.

This week, I awoke with a pounding in my ears, telling me to wake up.  I think I’ll resume strength training tomorrow, too.  And so I begin Project Me.